The Smell of Defeat.

I got out of bed this morning to look at the falling snow when I realized that what felt like a small bruise on my knee yesterday, felt more like an injury today. The clouds that are dumping massive amounts of snow on our city seem to have left a rather large deposit on my spirits as well. Ugh! I scream in my head. Ugh! Why me...wah, wah, wah. I think it began last night while praying for an increase in faith. I seem to have struck a little stone wall blocking me from stepping out of the boat. Although I used to run over hurdles at a pretty good speed this little wall seems insurmountable. What happened from my last blog when I was such an overcomer? Isn't it weird how you can fall or get stuck so quickly?

Quicksand comes to mind. I really don't know anything about quicksand...in fact, is quick sand actually real or can it only be found in the movies? I am not sure. Somewhere in the abyss of my brain I am reminded that when you are stuck in quicksand, the easiest way to get out is to not struggle. So fine! I throw my hands up. I give in and I stop my struggle. Psalm 40 "I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet upon a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God." Lord, I wait for you. Lift me out of the pit of unbelief and fear. Put in me a new song, one that calls out faith in others. May the blind eyes be open to see the depths of your love.

My knee is going to be fine. Going into week 10 of marathon training...if this is the first bump in the road, that is not so bad. On the agenda for tomorrow: 16 miles. Should I brave the snow or suffer on the treadmill. It is a tough call.